The Fundamental Importance of JOY!

Friday - August 10. 2012

Yesterday, Jonathan drove me to Matoaka so I could retrieve the “joy” from my former classroom.  Yup - literally!  We went on over to clean up some loose ends and to pick up my “joy!”   Many years ago, RSCP mom Jamie Leonard used the thumbprints of our many preschool students to create a sinuous, evocative Chinese dragon, curled into the word “joy.”  At Rock Spring, I worked in the front entry of the school, guarding the door perhaps and certainly remaining within earshot and instant access to any of my classrooms;  I had no real RSCP office to display my “joy” so this happy dragon peered down on me from my home office.  It seemed to me that it was waiting for circumstances to align in such a way that I could fulfill my decades long goal to return to an elementary classroom, to share my joy as an instructor rather than as an administrator. 

I LOVE how this joyful dragon is a composite piece, created from so many tiny thumbprints, assembled into a meaningful and lovely whole.  I love how that one word – JOY – embodies so much of what I feel in the classroom and what I hope to share, nurture, and preserve in education. This joyous dragon waited patiently on my shelf a long … long … time and gave me many smiles through the passions and tensions of preschool work, the stimulating demands of graduate school, and the natural concerns that perhaps a 50-year-old aspiring first-year teacher would not have such an easy time finding employment.   Last August, bringing this lovely RSCP gift into my new Matoaka classroom felt like I was linking my past educational experience and comfort to my new challenge.  “Joy” and excitement!  Happiness all around!  I loved having this dragon overlook my first grade classroom throughout the year and how some students made spontaneous connections with either the (difficult to read for a first grader) letters or the fact that it was indeed a (Chinese!) dragon.  And what exactly were all those dots?  Sunflower seeds?  Acorns?  Smarties?

So Thursday, when we returned to retrieve this “joy” - temporarily – from the classroom to return it to its place here at home, it felt like more of a finalization of my wrenchingly-abbreviated teaching tenure than simply handing in my keys.  Ah, there was a strong sense of finality in that moment and I did indeed feel some twangs … but I feel confident that – at some point – my “joy” will be back up in a classroom once again.  In the meantime, I will savor my “joy” – once more - at home … while I heal ....

HAPPILY – and in an amazing stroke of chance – I was fortunate enough to meet up with many colleagues during our brief trip to Matoaka.  Most importantly, walking down the dark hall, Tama and I ran into each other.  In the building at the same time.  In the hall at the same time.  No previous communication about plans.  What absolute luck! I was so excited to be able to introduce Tama and Jonathan.   I felt completely energized by her hugs, her positivity, her smiles, and all of her support and help.  How fortunate I have been in having Tama as my cooperating teacher during my student teaching and then down the hall for company, laughter, and mentorship during my first year of teaching.  Yes, it has been an odd and unexpected year but I have not lost sight of all the blessings and joy that Matoaka and its community have given me.  Tama is atop that list.

Today I am up at 3 a.m. - once more well before dawn.  Most pressingly, I continue to be anxious about understanding and addressing Jonathan's weight loss.  It is also an important medical day on my lymphoma journey.  Jonathan is driving me up to VCU for a follow-up PET scan.  This scan will provide a contrast to my initial PET scan in mid-May that identified and measured the lymphoma “hot” activity spots scattered throughout my torso and abdomen.  The final report should come in next week.  Compare and contrast.  Venn diagram, anyone?  Let’s hope for  MANY differences.  I want to see a dark PET scan!

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Our four hours at VCU encapsulated the classic rhythm of waiting and waiting and waiting at the hospital for my name to be called, for tests, for results, for consultations.  It's the standard.  It's the expectation.  Just accept that the system takes time to process correctly and accurately, pick up The New Yorker or The New York Times on iPad, and just settle in for the wait.  Today we bopped between venues for the PET scan (results next week) and the bloodwork (strong all around!) before we finally sprang out into the sunshine.

How best to reward oneself for hospital duty and to enjoy some special time with your Napoletana-certified pizza connoisseur son?  Stuzzi!   For the record, while Jonathan may have voiced a slight preference for D.C.'s 2Amy's, this authentic pizza is absolute bliss!  A fabulous meal with my wonderful boy  :)