Farewell Port!

Saturday - December 28, 2013

Yes, it's a milestone day in more than one sense.  First, today marks the second year anniversary of "when all hell broke loose" on the Cayman Islands.  On Dec. 28, 2011, the lymphoma aggregating behind my left eye set off an epic migraine headache that would last until chemo eradicated it in mid May 2012.  The meaning of the phrase "struck down" became clear;  one moment I was fine, the next I was bowled over by a crippling pain of unknown origin.  "Stricken."  And yet, the SUV level of that particular lymphoma activity turned out to be relatively low - hardly more than scar tissue.  I am grateful for this canary in the coal mine that signaled a problem even when I had no lumps, no bulges, no palpable lymph nodes that would have surfaced my underlining cancer.  That crushing headache was my saving grace.

Second, in perhaps a more positive spin, today I am port-free!  My life-saving and pain-relieving chemo was delivered via a power port that is no longer nested south of my right collar bone. Yesterday, the port was removed in what turned out to be a longer and more uncomfortable outing than we had originally anticipated.  A long wait before getting started was probably a result of holiday scheduling and staffing but the post-procedure discomfort shouldn't have been such a surprise; the incision isn't small and movement of my dominant right arm impacts my port site.  It will be at least five days until I am back up to normal movement, the wads of bandages come off, and the butterfly strips disengage.

After 19 months, it was rather gratifying to actually see my port.  The UCSF radiologist and staff had not before seen such a "high profile" (= visible and bumpy) port and assured me that their titanium double ports sit much flatter under the skin.  Whatever.  I do enjoy that they are promoting their hardware but I do NOT want to use it!  After all, I do have a superstitious streak thinking that removal of the port may jinx my recovery.  I know it's utter nonsense but I have been consistently worried that port removal will tempt fate.  Watchful waiting ... and worrying!  For now, I mindfully focus on the "Congratulations!" offered by the surgeon, the tech, the RN, and my beloved family.  Cancer-free and now PORT-free in the midst of completely obligation-free weeks with the children.  All together for the holidays.  Life is grand.